In my work as a therapist and coach, I often meet people who are exhausted by repeated misunderstandings 😔. Whether it’s within a couple, a family, or a work team, each person suffers in their own way. People often feel misunderstood, judged, or rejected, convinced that they’ve tried everything to improve the relationship, while blaming the other for not understanding them.
What I’ve discovered through my professional – and personal – experience is that, often, the key to breaking these cycles of conflict is simple but powerful: truly listening to the other person. Not listening to respond or defend oneself, but to understand how the other person feels and where their emotions come from. 🗝️💬
I speak from experience because I’ve also faced misunderstandings in my past relationships. Today, with my partner, we take the time to listen to each other, respect each other, and apply what I recommend to my clients to build a lasting and fulfilling relationship 💖. This journey of self-reflection and personal work is something I also experience daily.
😓Emotional exhaustion: At the heart of relationship conflicts
It’s not uncommon for people to come to therapy or coaching completely emotionally drained. They feel at their wit’s end, having repeated the same things to the other without being heard.
Frequent examples:
- In a couple, one partner might say: “I’ve explained how I feel a thousand times, but you never listen to me!”
- In a team, a colleague might share: “I’ve done everything to make things better, but I’m always the one getting blamed.”
These people are frustrated, convinced they’ve given everything without seeing any results. Often, they end up blaming the other person for the tensions, not realising that the real problem lies in broken communication 🧱.
👂Active listening: A fundamental shift
At the core of my approach is an essential tool: active listening. Truly listening means hearing the other person, without judgement, and with a genuine desire to understand their emotions, needs, and expectations 💡.
As the psychologist Carl Rogers said: “When someone really listens to you, without judging you, without trying to shape you, it feels great!“
Putting this into practice often helps to unblock situations, whether in a relationship, with family, or among colleagues. When everyone feels heard and understood, a sense of calm emerges, and constructive dialogue can finally begin 🗣️🤝.
“Active listening is the gateway to mutual understanding and a fertile ground for reconciliation.”
🔄 Personal reflection: A key to transformation
Listening to the other person is an essential step, but there’s another crucial element: self-reflection. I’ve often observed that when each person starts asking how they contributed to the problem, real transformations can happen ✨.
This process requires courage and a lot of vulnerability, but it’s vital to break free from the cycle of mutual blame. When someone in a relationship – whether romantic, familial, or professional – is willing to say: “What is my part in this situation?” then the process of reconciliation can truly begin.
By acknowledging our own responsibilities, we open the door to new possibilities for dialogue and lasting peace.
💞 empathy: Reconnecting with the other person
Once everyone starts listening and accepting their share of responsibility, authentic empathy can emerge. Empathy isn’t about solving someone else’s problems, but genuinely understanding them. It’s the ability to put yourself in the other person’s shoes, to see the world through their eyes, and to understand their pain and needs 🤲💫.
As researcher Brené Brown explains: “Empathy is not about fixing others. It’s simply about connecting to what they feel.“
Empathy is a crucial ingredient for restoring relationships, whether in a couple, with family, or at work. It allows everyone to feel understood, which strengthens trust and collaboration 🤝❤️.
🛠️ Transforming relationships: A shared effort
What I love about my job is witnessing these moments of transformation. Whether it’s a couple rediscovering their connection after years of tension, a family learning to communicate without conflict, or a team renewing respectful collaboration, these reconciliations are why I do this work.
This transformation process is something I’ve also experienced personally. It’s not always easy, but it’s deeply rewarding. It always begins with one simple but powerful step: listening to the other with empathy, while having the courage to reflect on oneself.
🙌 You are not alone: How I can help
My beliefs, my approach, and my personal experience have taught me that conflicts, however complex, can be transformed through listening and personal reflection.
If you’re ready to take that step, I’m here to support you on this path to transformation 🌱💖.
If you’re experiencing tension in your relationship, with a loved one or at work, know that you don’t have to face it alone 🌿. Sometimes, just a few sessions can be enough to restore healthy communication, rebuild understanding, and allow you to create more harmonious and fulfilling relationships.
👉 Curious to see how my support could help you? Get in touch!
#ActiveListening #Empathy #HarmoniousRelationships #CouplesTherapy #PersonalDevelopment